Dhambhadikam Tyagyam...

As I said last time I remembered an incident with Guruji, when I had gone to Bangalore last year to meet Him. A small incident with lots of learning :-)

We all had gathered to meet Guruji at Vrundavan and He was supposed to meet everyone individually. After waiting feverishly for an hour or two Guruji came and to my surprise He was talking and meeting with everyone except me! The more I would do some gesture to grab His attention, the more I was ignored! And finally He left without meeting even looking at me.

God! I was totally upset and didn't know why would a Master totally ignore His devotee? As Guruji always says a Master cannot even ignore a non-living object, so it's very difficult and painful for a Master Himself to ignore His devotee. Have I made some mistake? Did I do something wrong? I was left with no wonders but just questions, didn't even have my dinner that night!

After some days when I came back to my senses :-) I was listening to 'Narada Bhakti Sutras' a beautiful talk given by Guruji and there came the answers to all the questions!

Here is how Guruji explained it all "Dhambhadikam Tyagyam...Drop your feverishness for attention, see when there is love, behind love also come wanting-ness of attention. Do see this? Some one loves you very much and they don't simply give much attention to you that doesn't mean that they don't love you, but you crave for attention, even a child, say a child will be playing happily and moment some guests come, they (child) come around and show that they are somebody, they bring all their things they want attention. They think you are going to forget them. They will not allow you to talk to the guests!

You will wonder what has happened to this boy he was sitting in the corner all the time playing, and when the guest came he should also come with his books pencil papers and show you tell you and explain you...have you seen this?

The craving for attention! You want attention from everybody, people whom you love, you feel only if they give me attention then they love me, that is the expression for love for us. This is a mistaken notion! You know many times you are very close to somebody you don't give to much attention to them because you take it for granted that they are part of me. You take it for granted that they understand you very well so there is no need to give them attention. You give attention to somebody who is new. But then often it happens that person feels neglected and then they start behaving in a very funny manner. Do you see this happening? Craving for attention … ooh I was not attended, Pandit ji didn't ask me whether you had lunch or not he asked to somebody else....to experience divine love drop the ego and wanting-ness of attention ... Abhiman Dhambadikam....

Ego is the only obstruction to experience divine love I am somebody … I am someone … I have done so much … I am not being attended … I am an old devotee, I have been known for the past 4 yrs - 5yrs. But, I have not been attended!

Craving for attention you have to drop and your ego show off business too … you don't need to show off..."

Listening to this, then and there the 'Aahhoo!' happened. And that very moment I realized my attention seeking ego had already dropped that very day, if your Master Himself doesn't look at you, then from whom else would you crave for attention :-)

Dhambhadikam Tyagyam...I know it would have been difficult for Him also but lesson learnt was immensely valuable! The ways of Masters are mysterious; well I would say my Master Himself is mysterious :-)

That's all for now, lots of Guru stories and pearls of wisdom waiting for you! Have a great week ahead.

Love,
Satyajit